Lauren Mackler, bestselling author of Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life, renowned coach, and relationship expert, talks about mastering the art of aloneness and becoming the partner you seek. Lauren has risen to international prominence as the creator of Illumineering, a groundbreaking coaching method that integrates family systems work, psychodynamic psychology, and coaching to help people free themselves from the shackles of their life conditioning, and create the personal and professional lives to which they aspire.
Lauren's Interview about the Solemate Book
Lauren Mackler, bestselling author, life coach, and relationship expert, talks about her personal journey that inspired her bestselling book, Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life and workshop. Drawing from her own experiences; those of her coaching clients; and the fields of psychology, physiology, sociology, holistic healing, and strategic business practices, Lauren has developed a unique program for reclaiming your innate wholeness. This gradual, stepbystep process involves understanding where your selfdefeating patterns come from and how to move beyond them. She helps you uncover and retrieve your authentic self—who you really are beneath the layers of life conditioning. Laurens groundbreaking program will help you live in a more conscious and deliberate way, move beyond your self-defeating patterns, and become the person you were born to be.
Solemate at Boston Center for Adult Education: 3/13/10
Many people spend years waiting for a soul mate to make them complete. Others settle for unfulfilling relationships out of fear of being alone. Renowned coach, radio host, and bestselling author of “Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life” Lauren Mackler will present her groundbreaking roadmap to help you achieve mastery of your own life, so you can experience a sense of wholeness and well-being on your own or in a relationship. Based upon Lauren’s “Solemate” book, this presentation is about treating yourself well, shedding your self-defeating patterns, and becoming the person you were born to be.
March 13, 2010
10:00am – 12:00pm
Boston Center for Adult Education 122 Arlington Street Boston, MA 02116 617.267.4430
Click here for more information.
Alone on February 14?
Valentine’s Day is, for many singles, a holiday to dread instead of one to celebrate. I experienced my own loneliness on more than one Valentine’s Day. Then, several years ago, I had a revelation. I could be my own Valentine! I know, being your own Valentine might sound like a desperate attempt to soothe the sting of single life. I thought so, too—until I actually experienced it. The first year of becoming my own Valentine, I organized a dinner at a nice restaurant for a group of single men and women. On the invitation I wrote a request: “buy, have gift-wrapped, and bring to dinner a gift for yourself in recognition of the magnificent person you are.”
It was one of my favorite Valentine’s Day celebrations! We took turns opening our gifts and sharing what we admired about ourselves. Some people were moved to tears, as they realized ... Click here to read the entire article on HealYourLife.com.
Solemate Review by Joan Borysenko!
Solemate Review by Joan Borysenko!Author of It's Not the End of the World: Developing Resilience in Times of Change
“I had the pleasure to be on Lauren Mackler's Life Keys radio show (every Thursday 1-2pm EST) on HayHouseRadio.com. What a delight Lauren is. Smart, insightful, real, and full of excellent advice. Lauren is the author of the international bestseller, Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life. The book is a real page-turner. Lauren's life story is riveting . . . from the magic of marrying a handsome young physician and moving overseas to recognizing that she'd lost herself in the needs of another. She came back to the States broke, dispirited, and with two kids to support. Lauren recovered from depression and became a celebrated therapist, author, and coach. She provides warm and wise advice about the core issues that prevent us from being happy and at home in our own skin. She's the real deal and I think you'll really enjoy her book.”
Solemate Review
I came across this Solemate review and wanted to share with you. Solemate Review on SOLO dot MOM. The review is in. My review that is, on the book, Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life by Lauren Mackler.
I have been reading this book sent to me for the purpose of doing a review and wanted to share it with my readers here. Some books I get like this, I don’t recommend and won’t post about them. But this one – I do recommend you read it – especially after divorce. However, others whether single or happily married, can glean from the information about ‘finding yourself’ as well. This book outlines a process for not only finding WHO YOU ARE but becoming the person you were meant to be, the type person you would want be with and experience a sense of wholeness instead of looking for a person out there to ‘complete you.’
You have recently heard me dispel the idea of finding your soul mate. This book helps you cope with the realization that you need to develop your own life vision, your own action plan to get yourself into gear and not rely on someone else (an ideal partner) to make you happy. In other words finding contentment with yourself can make you content with your world around you.
This in no way is to suggest that you don’t need relationships in your life. On the contrary the book outlines the very need we as humans have for other people to be in our lives – our outer support system. Solemate has a whole chapter titled: Building an Inner and Outer Support System.
By becoming a whole person it will help you and I to have healthier relationships with a life partner. Working on ourselves, owning our stuff that we have carried around with us... Click here to read the entire review.
Solemate Workshop at Kripalu: 4/18-21, 2010
Many people spend years waiting for a “soul mate” to complete them. Others settle for unfulfilling relationships out of fear of being alone. Solemate is about freeing yourself from the shackles of your life conditioning and reclaiming your innate wholeness. It’s a groundbreaking roadmap to achieve mastery of your life, and experience joy on your own or in a relationship. Based upon Lauren’s Solemate book, it’s about shedding old, self-defeating patterns, and becoming the person you were born to be. The workshop is for people who are single or divorced, or seeking greater independence within their partnership. April 18-21, 2010 Kripalu Lenox, MA 866.200.5203
Solemate 12 Session Teleseminar
Are you turning your goals into action?
Watch Lauren talk about bringing your goals to fruition!
Many people set goals, but give up after a few days, weeks, or months. This is because their Conditioned Self and habitual patterns have, once again, taken control of their lives. Self-mastery requires commitment, support, and practice. During Lauren's 12-session Solemate Teleseminar, she helps you achieve greater self-mastery by giving you concrete tools and strategies to implement each month. This teleseminar will be the best gift to yourself for 2010! It will keep you “on-course” and motivated to achieve the personal and professional life to which you aspire. You can sign up anytime during 2010 as you'll have access to listen to all previous sessions.
Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life 12-Session Teleseminar January 14 - December 9, 2010 Purchase Now!
So, how do you follow through on your commitments and goals? By identifying the limiting beliefs, fears, and behaviors that keep you stuck, and learning how to override them.
Solemate: 12-Session Teleseminar with Lauren Mackler
Teleseminar with renowned coach & bestselling author Lauren Mackler! Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life 12-Session Teleseminar with Lauren Mackler January 14-December 9, 2010 Format: Live Teleseminar
Regular Price: $240 Discounted Price: $199 If you purchase the program after the January 14, 2010 start date, you will receive access to previous sessions, following the purchase of the complete program.
Monthly Giveaway: Your name will also be placed in the virtual hat for a chance to receive one of the monthly gifts being offered by Lauren during this year-long program.
Are you ready to join renowned coach and bestselling author Lauren Mackler to achieve greater self-mastery and well-being? To find out, notice how many “yes” answers you have to the following statements:
___ I want to make changes in my life, but I don’t know where to begin. ___ I’m unable to move beyond my fears to pursue the life I dream of. ___ I feel dissatisfied with myself and my life. ___ I have difficulty following through on the goals I set for myself. ___ I often say or do things to get others’ approval. ___ I tend to make others’ needs more important than my own. ___ I’m settling for less than my heart’s desire. ___ I often feel overwhelmed and stressed. ___ I worry that I won’t be able to provide for myself. ___ I withhold my thoughts and feelings to avoid being judged or rejected. ___ I often have trouble controlling my emotions. ___ I often feel alone and unsupported in my life. ___ I always keep myself busy or with people to avoid being alone. ___ I usually avoid conflict and have difficulty expressing anger. ___ I’m constantly striving for perfection, but nothing ever feels good enough. ___ I tend to withdraw and isolate myself. ___ I believe that if I could just find my soul mate, I’d be happy and complete. ___ I’m in a relationship, but I still feel lonely. ___ I feel unclear about my own interests and passions.
If you checked one or more boxes, make 2010 the year you create a life you love!
Mastering the art of aloneness means:
- Loving, trusting, and accepting yourself.
- Being able to care for yourself emotionally and financially.
- Expressing your true feelings, thoughts, and needs with others.
- Feeling like a powerful, worthy, and deserving person.
- Treating yourself with compassion, love, and respect.
- Feeling whole and happy on your own or in a relationship.
- Sharing healthy and supportive relationships with others.
- Pursuing and achieving your own dreams and goals.
Self-mastery requires commitment, support, and practice. During this 12-session event, Lauren helps you master the art of aloneness by giving you concrete tools and skills to practice each month. Based on her Solemate book, Lauren guides you through 12 life-changing sessions that provide a clear road map for living a joyful and fulfilling life.
All sessions are from 7pm-8:30pm Eastern Time, 4pm-5:30pm Pacific Time
January 14, Session 1: Embracing Your Aloneness Mastering the art of aloneness is about developing a strong, healthy relationship with yourself, and achieving wholeness and well-being on your own or in a relationship.
February 11, Session 2: Uncovering Your Conditioned Self Uncover the core limiting beliefs and habitual behaviors that keep you from living the life you want.
March 11 , Session 3: Managing Fear So It Doesn’t Manage You Discover the underlying roots of the fears that keep you stuck, and tools for overriding them.
April 8, Session 4: Living Deliberately Versus By Default Learn about the 3 levels of creation and how to align your thoughts and actions with the results you seek.
May 13, Session 5: Reclaiming Your Innate Wholeness Take action to reclaim your innate wholeness and become the person you were born to be.
June 10, Session 6: Becoming the Partner You Seek Instead of expecting someone else to make you whole, become the partner you seek.
July 8, Session 7: Creating Your Life Vision Create a life vision that inspires you, and keeps you focused on your goals and priorities.
August 12, Session 8: Building an Inner Support System Build a strong inner support system that generates optimal health, energy, and resiliency.
September 9, Session 9: Building an Outer Support System Build a strong outer support system that helps you achieve your life vision.
October 14, Session 10: Bringing Your Vision to Life Develop a concrete action plan to bring your life vision to reality.
November 18, Session 11: Sustaining Your Commitment Sustain your focus, commitment, and motivation to stay on-course and achieve your life vision.
December 9, Session 12: Your Mastering the Art of Aloneness Tool Kit Use the practical tools you’ve learned when old patterns are triggered, or you’re faced with a life crisis or challenge.
Purchase the Teleseminar now and receive a discounted price of only $199!
Watch Lauren speak about her work.
Solemate at Cambridge Center for Adult Education: 3/6/10
Many people spend years waiting for a soul mate to make them complete. Others settle for unfulfilling relationships out of fear of being alone. Renowned coach, radio host, and bestselling author of “Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life” Lauren Mackler will present her groundbreaking roadmap to help you achieve mastery of your own life, so you can experience a sense of wholeness and well-being on your own or in a relationship. Based upon Lauren's “Solemate” book, this presentation is about treating yourself well, shedding your self-defeating patterns, and becoming the person you were born to be.
March 6, 2010
10:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m.
Cambridge Center for Adult Education
42 Brattle Street
Cambridge. MA
617.547.6789
Hay House Interview with Lauren Mackler
1. There are a multitude of self-help books that address many of the same topics as Solemate. These include books for singles, and books about how to overcome fear, live a more fulfilling life, and build self-esteem. What makes Solemate different from the rest? Many self-help books targeted to singles are “how to” books for snaring the perfect mate. They reinforce the myth that happiness is found by searching outside yourself—instead of within yourself. Other self-help books focus on overcoming low self-esteem, fear, and loneliness, but fail to address their root causes—the limiting beliefs and behaviors we learn in childhood that drive our adults lives. And, while there are a few books that espouse the message that aloneness can be a positive experience, they don’t offer a clear roadmap for how to make it a reality. Click here to read more.
Drawing from my own experiences and those of my clients, as well as the fields of psychology, physiology, sociology, holistic healing, and strategic business practices, I’ve developed a unique program that helps people move beyond the limitations that spring from their early conditioning and begin to live in alignment with what I call the “authentic self”—the person they were born to be. And, unlike other personal development books that are purely theoretical, Solemate includes quizzes, exercises, and guided journaling that help readers understand where their self-defeating patterns come from ...
Solemate at Boston Center for Adult Education: 12/19/09
Many people spend years waiting for a soul mate to make them complete. Others settle for unfulfilling relationships out of fear of being alone. Renowned coach, radio host, and bestselling author of “Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life” Lauren Mackler will present her groundbreaking roadmap to help you achieve mastery of your own life, so you can experience a sense of wholeness and well-being on your own or in a relationship. Based upon Lauren's “Solemate” book, this presentation is about treating yourself well, shedding your self-defeating patterns, and becoming the person you were born to be. December 19, 2009 10:00am - 12:00pm Boston Center for Adult Education Boston, MA
Solemate Review on SingleWomenRule.com
Finding your sole mateBy Keysha Whitaker October 26, 2009
You are your sole mate. If you didn’t know this, you’ll quickly figure it out after reading Lauren Mackler’s book, Solemate, Master the Art of Aloneness and Transform Your Life. Solemate is a journey that begins with deconstructing negative ideas of aloneness (many people still think alone means unhappy and unloved) and ends with mastering aloneness, which Mackler says “is about changing your habitual patterns of behavior”. Along the way, if you’re committed, you’ll discover your authentic self, a self that does not expect a mate to complete them.
Mackler’s writing style is clear and quick. Solemate, written for men and women, is one-part memoir, one-part clinical study, one-part self-help. Mackler, a coach and psychotherapist, opens with the beginning - and end - of her “storybook marriage” to a successful German physician: “It was only years later, through my personal development work, that I recognized the underlying problem: we had come together for all the wrong reasons. We had been drawn to each other because of voids within ourselves . . . Click here to read the entire review.
Solemate Presentation at Downtown Women's Club. YWCA Newburyport - 10/29/09
Mastering the Art of Aloneness (in or out of relationships)presented by Best Selling Author Lauren Mackler
10/29 @ 7:30pm
YWCA Newburyport 13 Market Street Newburyport, MA
Please RSVP to Kristine@kismet-consulting.com
Open to professional women members and non-members of the Downtown Women’s Club (Membership of DWC is free and encouraged. Please visit their website to sign up: www.downtownwomensclub.com)
Solemate: FREE Teleseminar on Maestro Conference - 10/29/09
I’m delighted to invite you to my free teleseminar, Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life, on October 29th, 5:00pm-6:00pm EST. I’ll be presenting my groundbreaking roadmap to help you achieve mastery of your life, and a sense of wholeness and well-being—on your own or in a relationship.
When we’re born, we’re whole, integrated human beings with tremendous potential. We respond to our life conditioning by adopting habitual thought and behavior patterns, many of which erode our innate wholeness. Instead of expecting someone else to complete you, I’ll help you reclaim your innate wholeness by shedding self-defeating patterns, overriding your fears, and “living deliberately” to create the life to which you aspire!
My teleseminar is one of more than 80 programs during MaestroMonth – a truly amazing offering in October from fellow speakers Deepak Chopra, Joan Borysenko, Marianne
Williamson, John Gray, and many other leading experts. The seminars in health, personal growth, business, spirituality, and societal change feature many bestselling authors, all helping you to unleash your full potential. I'm excited to be part of this group and to offer you this free Solemate teleseminar!
The calls offer not only valuable content, but also a fully interactive experience
on MaestroConference, a new technology that allows you to engage me and other participants as if we're in a live workshop. I believe that people learn best when they're interacting and sharing what they're learning, which is what MaestroConference makes possible.
Register Now to gain access to my teleconference and up to two other free calls during MaestroMonth. You can also participate in as many calls as you like with a $1 trial membership. In addition, there are eight free gifts from participants and sponsors.
Feel free to forward this offer to your friends. I hope to see you on my call!
Solemate Review & Giveaway on BlissTree.com
I wanted to share this wonderful review of Solemate by Cherie Burbach. She is also giving away a free copy of Solemate. Click the link below to enter the contest!
September 24, 2009 by Cherie Burbach
As a dating writer, I know all too well that woman try and find one special person in their life, a soul mate, so they will finally feel “complete.” The problem is, when a woman isn’t complete in herself, she can’t ever really be happy with anyone. A woman that doesn’t understand this will not only have troubles in romantic relationships, but also in other types of relationships as well.
For any woman that has felt a little empty (regardless if its dating related or simply in everyday life), I encourage you to read this wonderful book by Lauren Mackler called Solemate. I was riveted because it is not only beautifully written but gives excellent advice as well. The subtitle of this book “Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life” may make you believe that the book encourages women to be alone all the time. But what the book really does is makes women become so comfortable in their own skin that they attractive the very best types of relationships to them.
Click here to win a copy of Solemate! The last day to win is Tuesday, September 29th.
Solemate: FREE Hay House Online Seminar - 10/15/09
Join me LIVE on Thursday, October 15th for this FREE Online Seminar!
Solemate: Uncover Your Authentic Self & Transform Your Life
Renowned coach, psychotherapist, and bestselling author of Solemate, Lauren Mackler, teaches you her groundbreaking roadmap to achieve mastery of your life, and a sense of wholeness and well-being on your own or in a relationship. When we’re born, we’re whole, integrated human beings with tremendous potential. We respond to our life conditioning by adopting habitual thought and behavior patterns, many of which erode our innate wholeness. Instead of expecting someone else to complete you, Lauren helps you reclaim your innate wholeness by shedding your self-defeating patterns, overriding your fears, and “living deliberately” to create the life to which you aspire.
Solemate at Emerson Wellness Center: 10/24/09
Many people spend years waiting for a soul mate to make them complete. Others settle for unfulfilling relationships out of fear of being alone. Renowned coach, radio host, and bestselling author of “Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life” Lauren Mackler will present her groundbreaking roadmap to help you achieve mastery of your own life, so you can experience a sense of wholeness and well-being on your own or in a relationship. Based upon Lauren's “Solemate” book, this presentation is about treating yourself well, shedding your self-defeating patterns, and becoming the person you were born to be.
The workshop is designed for women and men who are single or divorced, or seeking greater independence within their partnership.
Solemate Book Signing Event at Uplifting Connections, Bridgewater, MA: 10/22/09
Please join me for my Solemate book signing event at Uplifting Connections in Bridgewater, MA.
Uplifting Connections 1355 Pleasant Street Bridgewater, MA 508-697-2334
Click here for more information.
Solemate is about mastering the art of aloneness. But it is not about being alone. It's a book for people who wish to enhance the quality of their lives by improving their relationships with themselves and with others.
Solemate gives you the tools you need to develop the self-awareness, life skills, and emotional intelligence to live a full, happy, successful, and financially secure life - with or without a partner.
Solemate Amazon Review Response
Someone just sent me a reader’s review of Solemate that was posted on Amazon. The reviewer made a good point that I want to address in my blog, since I have no way of contacting the person directly. The reviewer, a cognitive behavior therapist, gave Solemate a glowing review but only gave it 4 stars out of 5 because of my failure to include same-sex relationship examples in the book.
First, I want to say how much I appreciate the lovely review, and secondly, I’d like to thank the reviewer for pointing this out. After I read the review, I reflected on why it didn’t dawn on me to use same-sex examples. The answers that came up are these: 1) I’ve found that the type of relationship dynamics I talk about in Solemate tend to be universal—whether it’s a straight or same-sex couple—so it didn’t occur to me to differentiate between various types of relationships, and 2) although I’ve worked with gay and lesbians in my individual coaching programs, I’ve only had the opportunity to work with straight couples in my relationship coaching programs, so I had no same-sex couples’ case studies of my own to use.
I’m grateful to the reviewer for making me more aware of the importance of including same-sex relationship examples when discussing partnership dynamics, which I will certainly do going forward. I apologize if you found my omission hurtful or off-putting, as it was genuinely not my intention.